


Heartbroken Music

by NikAdair



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Keith is Heartbroken, Klance breakup, last kiss idea, musician keith
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-21
Updated: 2019-03-21
Packaged: 2019-11-26 20:36:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,426
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18185447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NikAdair/pseuds/NikAdair
Summary: What should’ve been a day of celebration turns into a night of lasts, leaving Keith falling apart and reeling from everything.





	Heartbroken Music

**Author's Note:**

> I know this isn’t the best written fic out there, it’s really just a vent fic of sorts. I have a lot of feelings right now and I wanted to write them out and ended up writing this. I hope you enjoy.

When Keith left that night, he didn’t know it’d be the last time he was there. When he kissed Lance goodbye, he didn’t know it’d be the last time he did. When he looked back at the door, he didn’t know it’d be the last time he saw it. He didn’t know it’d be the last time he’d hear that name and be able to smile, to laugh. To feel whole and complete. He didn’t know all that when he left.

He’d been over at Lance’s that night celebrating his acceptance into college. Not just any college – the prestigious music school he’d applied for with little faith he’d get in. Keith had sent in his application that fall, hope so low it was barely there. “There’s no way they’ll accept me, I’m not good enough to get in,” Keith had said, closing his laptop with a sigh.

“Are you kidding me? They’d be crazy not to. You spend so much time practicing and playing and working. There’s no way they’d be able wouldn’t let you in,” Lance said, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. Keith leaned into this hold, closing his eyes. “You’re such an amazing player. If they don’t accept you, they’re missing out.”

A few months later, right before winter break, he’d gotten an email about getting an audition spot. “Lance! Lance, look!” Keith yelled, running towards him, phone in hand. Lance caught him, taking his phone and holding it up to read. His eyebrows furrowed as he read, and Keith stood there, holding his breath in excitement. Lance’s eyes lit up and wide smile spread over his lips.

He dropped his arm, looking at Keith with sparkling eyes. “Babe, this is amazing! I told you they’d accept you!” Lance wrapped him up and spun them around, laughing as he did. Keith laughed with him, throwing his head back as he was spun. Lance was a little breathless when he set him down, his arms dropping to settle on his waist, their foreheads resting together.

“I haven’t been accepted yet. I still need to get through auditions,” Keith whispered, looking up into shining eyes. Lance’s let out a huff of laughter, his smile growing smaller but more intimate. He pulled Keith closer to him, they’re bodies almost touching. Their noses brushed against each other, sending a shiver through his body.

“You’re going to ace that audition and get into that school, I just know it,” Lance whispered back, his voice hushed. Keith nodded a little, unable to say anything. Those eyes held his attention, the half lidded look making his heart flip. Lance tilted his head a little, their lips brushing ever so slightly. Enough to make Keith chase after them, capturing them in a soft kiss. A quick one, followed by another, and another.

That had been back in December. Keith’s audition was in February. He’d spent all his free time practicing his solo – some days Lance would come in and watch him, offering tips on making it sound better. Others, he would spend hours in a practice room alone, the only company being the music bouncing off the walls. Over and over, note after note, page after page. Practicing passages until his fingers flew over keys and notes sounded perfectly. At least, perfect to him.

On the day of his audition, Lance came and picked him up. Keith was frantically packing his bag when he walked into his room. “Clarinet, reeds, cork grease, reed geek, music. I’m missing something. What am I missing?” Keith muttered to himself, rifling through his bag. He didn’t hear Lance come in, too busy pulling things out and putting them back in. He jumped when a pair of arms wrapped around his waist.

“You’re application love, that’s what you’re missing. It’s on your desk,” Lance whispered, his breath against his ear. It related Keith, his eyes going to the red folder sitting atop notebooks and papers. He sighed, stepping out of Lance’s embrace and grabbing the folder, flipping it open long enough to see his application filled out and tucked safely in the pocket. He slipped it behind his music, careful to not catch the pages.

Keith closed the bag, setting it next to his clarinet, before turning towards Lance. He looked at him with pride and affection, that smile a grounding piece for him. He could feel his anxiety starting to melt away, his nerves calming down. He took a deep breath, closing his eyes and forcing himself to calm down and breath. When he opened them, Lance was closer, that smile still on his face.

“We should get going so we don’t get there late,” Keith said, his voice soft as he looked up into Lance’s eyes. Lance nodded slightly, neither of them moving. They looked into each other’s eyes, quiet, smiling softly at each other. It was like they were under a spell, neither able to look away. They jumped when Keith’s phone went off, his alarm telling him he had to leave.

Keith scrambled to turn it off, his face flushing. Lance chuckled, reaching around him and taking his bag, handing him his clarinet. “Let’s get you to that audition. You’re gonna nail it.” Lance’s voice was so full of confidence that it was hard for Keith to feel anything but confident. He went into his audition with his head held high, all doubt gone from his mind.

That had been two months ago. It was late April, graduation less than a month away, and Keith was pacing in front of his front door, waiting for the mail to get there. He’d been counting down the days until he got his letter about whether he would get in or not. Lance had promised that no matter what the letter said, they would celebrate – either celebrate his acceptance or celebrate his bravery in applying.

Keith had already been accepted to his second choice school. He’d gotten that letter shortly after his audition. He’d been ecstatic to know he got into that school. It was a really good school. But it wasn’t a music school. It wasn’t the one he wanted to go to. Not whole heartedly. So he counted down the days, marking off dates on his calendar until he got to the big circled date. ‘LETTER ARRIVES TODAY’ in big red letters.

The mailman walked up the sidewalk and handed him his mail. Keith took it, nodding a quick thanks before running inside. He flipped through the envelopes. “Shiro, Shiro, Adam, Shiro… AHA! There it is!” He pulled out a blue and black envelope, a sticker with his name on it popping off the paper in white. He walked to his room, his heart pounding.

With shaking hands, he tore the top open, pulling out the letter. His eyes scanned the page quickly, reading through how they’d had quite a few clarinetists who’d audition and that it was hard to pick from everyone. He got to the last paragraph and he smiled wide. “Shiro!! Adam!! I got in!!” Keith yelled, running down the hall to their room.

They were busy grading papers from their classes and they jumped as Keith ran in. Shiro looked up at him, an eyebrow quirked and Adam walked over to him, taking the letter. Keith bounced excitedly, unable to contain his happiness. Adam’s eyes widened and he looked up at him, a proud smile showing. He passed the letter to Shiro before wrapping Keith in a huge.

“Look at our maestro!” Adam said, squeezing Keith in a side hug. Keith laughed, ducking out from his arms. He didn’t get far before Shiro got ahold of him, squeezing him almost as tightly as Adam. Keith pushed against him, fixing his hair after it got tousled in the struggle. “This calls for a celebratory dinner,” Adam said, pulling out his phone. “What should we have?”

Keith scratched the back of his head, pocketing the letter. “Actually, Lance and I have plans tonight. He’d promised that no matter what the letter said, we’d celebrate tonight.” Shiro and Adam looked at each other, nodding a little, before turning back to him, both smiling.

“Alright. Just be safe,” Adam said, a hint of humour in his voice. Keith groaned, rolling his eyes as he turned. “And be home by midnight! You still have school tomorrow!” Keith looked back and gave him a thumbs up before heading back to his room, texting Lance to tell him that he was coming over.

The car ride was quick, Keith almost speeding on his way over. He was excited to tell Lance. Excited to see his excitement. To see the pride he had for him. That was exactly what he was greeted with when he got there. Lance had met him outside, immediately wrapping him a hug, telling him he was proud of him for getting.

They’d spent that time night cuddled together, watching movies and eating pizza, until Keith had to leave. Lance walked him to his car, giving him a soft, lingering kiss before letting him get into the car. When Keith looked up at him, his eyes looked a little sad, but he blinked and the sadness had disappeared. He thought he’d imagined it. He was ready to believe it too. Until he got home.

Keith was getting ready to send Lance a goodnight text when he got a text from him. He was still smiling and buzzing from everything that had happened that day that he didn’t think it was anything else than a goodnight text. His smile fell as soon as he started reading it. Tears stung his eyes, his chest constricting and his heart breaking.

_You’re such a great guy Keith. Such an amazing guy. But us, we’re not meant to last. You’re so focused on music, there’s no time for me. Not enough time for us to be together. I love you, I promise I do. But Keith, I’m breaking up with you._ The words that Keith had dreaded ever hearing.

“No, please…” Keith whispered, dropping his phone at the same time the first tear fell. “Lance, please…!” His breathing became shallower, his vision completely clouded with tears. He picked his phone up as a sob escaped him, and he read and reread the message over and over. More sobs escaped him and tears streaked down his cheeks. He threw his phone, hearing it hit the wall and slide to the floor.

He sobbed and sobbed, his heart physically hurting. Adam and Shiro came in at one point, disheveled and worried. Keith couldn’t talk, he just pointed to his phone, burying himself into his sheets. He kept muttering the same thing over and over. “It’s my fault… I should’ve been better…” Over and over until his voice was hoarse. Over and over until he couldn’t think of anything else.

Keith blamed himself. Of course he did. Who else was he going to blame? Lance had promised him everything. And Keith ruined it because of his music. He let out a hoarse yell, muffled by his blanket. He hated himself. Hated himself for not being better. Hated himself for focusing on only his music. Hated himself because he went and ruined the one good thing he had. He hated himself for ruining everything.

“Keith, it’s not your fault. You didn’t do anything. This was all him,” Shiro said softly, rubbing a hand on his back in an attempt to calm him down. It didn’t do much. Keith curled further in on himself, another sob escaping. “Lance is the one who wanted to end things. You did everything you could. He’s the one who couldn’t see that.”

Adam joined him on the bed, his hand gently squeezing Keith’s knee. “You are so talented, so brave, so loving. Lance is too dumb to realize it. You gave him as much as you could, and he took it for granted. You did nothing wrong Keith.” Adam squeezed his knee again, and Keith shook his head again.

“It’s my fault. I should have been better. I should have stopped everything with music. I should have given him more. I should have loved him better.” Keith’s voice broke as he spoke, his heart throbbing again. It hurt. It hurt more than when he’d broken his arm in middle school. More than when his dad died. More than anything he’d ever felt. His heart felt like it was physically tearing in two, ripping inside his chest.

Shiro sighed, his hand stilling. “Keith, please believe us. You gave him everything you could. I saw how tired you were in the morning. How you gave him all the time you could. How you’d stay up late at night to talk to him. You gave him everything. You were the best you could be.” Shiro’s voice was soft but had a stern edge to it. “There’s nothing more you could’ve given him without losing yourself.”

Keith sobbed, his tears soaking the sheets. He knew it was late. Knew by the yawns he heard from Adam and Shiro. Knew from the buzz that always came with late night texts from Pidge. He took a deep breath, steadying himself, and sat up, scrubbing at his face. Adam and Shiro looked at him, and he looked away, shoving down a sob.

“I’m okay,” he said, his voice hoarse. “You can go back to bed. I’m sorry for waking you.” His voice cracked at the end, and he coughed, hiding it in deep breaths. Keith bit his lip, knowing that they were looking at him. The bed shifted as they stood, wrapping him in a hug. A sob threatened to escape as they let go, turning to leave.

“We’ll always be here for you if you need us Keith,” Adam said. Keith nodded and they left, closing the door with them. Keith curled back up in his sheets, burying his face in his pillows as more tears fell. His heart hurt and his head hurt. His eyes stung from tears and his hair stuck to his face.

He never thought that the last time he saw Lance would be the last time he saw him. That the last time he kissed him would be the last one. He’d never thought that the boy he loved more than anything would leave him. Would leave him in pieces. Keith felt himself falling apart with no way to fix anything. He fell asleep hating himself for not being enough. For not being able to keep Lance in his life. He felt asleep that night heartbroken and hurting.


End file.
